You know you're a Pyro when...

[50AE]

No you do that because you wish to feel more intelligent and somehow superior to the person at the store not because your a pyro

 

Not really, but because you have the habit of reading and naming it CMC everywhere.

[Ralph]

Not really, but because you have the habit of reading and naming it CMC everywhere.

 

A person that isn't pretentious would say CMC not carboxyl methyl cellulose

[50AE]

Heh yeah, I remember I first said CMC. Then the seller went:

-What?!!

-Carboxyl methyl cellulose....

-What is this?

-It's the cheapest wallpaper glue you have here, in white flakes.

-Can you use simpler language next time please? Each time you come here, you ask us for weird stuff, like methanol and dextrin and now... CMC?

Edited March 14, 2011 by 50AE

[pyrochris732]

when you spend time on pyro supply stores and APC even though you cant currently engage in any pyro activities. You also know you have it bad when you BUY items from those pyro supply stores.

 

 

[Ralph]

Heh yeah, I remember I first said CMC. Then the seller went:

-What?!!

-Carboxyl methyl cellulose....

-What is this?

-It's the cheapest wallpaper glue you have here, in white flakes.

-Can you use simpler language next time please? Each time you come here, you ask us for weird stuff, like methanol and dextrin and now... CMC?

 

oh thats different sorry

[madmandotcom]

when you spend time on pyro supply stores and APC even though you cant currently engage in any pyro activities. You also know you have it bad when you BUY items from those pyro supply stores.

your signed up to the skylighter newsletter even though your outside their delivery zone

nb

dont do this, then you receive bvouchers and its even worse

[madmandotcom]

when you hear tyres screeching and think "somebody's having fun with sodium sylicilate"

you have a noise curfew imposed on you by the neighbours

annoyingly mine is 630 so only in the middle of winter i get about half an hour to do any dark shoots and in summer i cant do much at all in the dark

your a night owl

[Richtee]

Finally, I got someone to laugh lol.

 

mormanman, you have no idea...

 

 

What do you mean.

hahahahaha...damn... THAT is fuggin' funny!

 

Thanks for dragging this beauty up again!

Edited May 4, 2011 by Richtee

[killforfood]

If you wipe a couple times extra just to get to the core.

[SjeefOne]

Nice topic Some of these ones made me giggle in my office

 

You know you're a pyro when ;

 

- You tell your girlfriend to be sure not to knock over the two little glass bottles in your freezer.

- You go to a knitting store asking to buy thread of around 1mm and it has to be 100% cotton.

- You use google maps only looking for nice places to shoot rockets from.

- You tell your colleagues you save all cardboard tubes you come across for your nephew who's really into crafts (and they probably think why he needs soo much!)

- You confess to your mother 10 years after the fact that the scorch marks on her coffee-maker she never noticed where your first smoke bomb experiment gone somewhat wrong.

- You like it when your presents are wrapped in kraft paper and you save it for no apparent reason.

- You take your close friends to the woods late at night on or around their birthday.

- You tell your girlfriend that the slightly dark tinted Tupperware boxes she put in the cupboard are not to be used for food any more.

- You are always exceptionally kind and courteous to your neighbours when carrying a big shopping bag in the elevator with the top folded over to conceal what's in it

[DanielC]

Sorry guys I have to bring this one back

 

...when walking into your pyro shop and taking a deep breath makes you smile

...when most of your video files conclude with you giggling

...when your wife, family and friends check with you before throwing any type of containers or wood scrap away

...when local tree services call to ask if you can use whatever they cut that day

...when you smell sulfur burning and your heartrate speeds up

...when even your non pyro friends can name effects in the local 4th of July show

...when your wife asks for shells in your wedding colors and then adds " could we add a battle in the sky finale"

...when passers by wonder what the hell you are doing in the yard with a 3" mortar tube, a stopwatch and a crate of baseballs

...when you never tire hearing the oohs and ahhs from folks admiring your hard, dirty, and sometimes dangerous handiwork

Edited October 30, 2011 by DanielC

[firebird]

Well that narrows people from this thread down quite a bit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These arn't really jokes, more things that have actually happened

 

 

 

Right clicking on the firework/chem folder freezes your computer due to it's size.

 

You're no longer afraid to admit you manufacture pyrotechnics

 

You say that your marriage proposal will involve fireworks, and people no longer think it's for the sentiment

 

Your 3 gig porn folder is over shadowed by the 11 gig pyro folder.

 

Can't decide whether the cheap SS pots on sale will be a beer boiling kettle, or star roller..........so you get two

 

Advise people not to put uncovered groceries in your trunk.

 

Have a sudden desire to beat people with a steel pipe for the stupid jokes in this thead (I'm not an angry person, am I?)

 

 

Your 3 gig porn folder is over shadowed by the 11 gig pyro folder.

Oh man that one is funny

[nater]

Advise people not to put uncovered groceries in your trunk

 

 

you tell someone they shouldn't smoke near your car and they don't ask why not and just move.

 

you can't find any lighter fluid at work to start the grill and your co-workers open up your car to find something that will work.

Edited December 6, 2011 by nater

[Blackthumb]

...does this one count?.....working on the other side of the lake the other day when a large explosion rocked the area and I called home to see if I had left the ball mill running!

[Trippiej!]

You know you're a Pyro when most of your broomsticks are shorter than your comfortzone.

[Tanner808]

...when you read ten pages of pyro jokes and can relate to most of them

[mikeee]

You know you are a Pyro, when you go to the airport you set off the detectors after they swab your hands.

[50AE]

...you know you're a pyro when others tell you that your clothes have a weird smell of chemicals and you can't sense it.

 

... you know you're a pyro when you walk into a supermarket and melons look to you like aerial shells ; pasta like some rolling medium ; cans like case formers ;

 

... you know you're a pyro when the shopkeeper knows you as the "starch guy", because sometimes you come and buy all the starch.

Edited May 26, 2012 by 50AE

[Seymour]

Really? Do you know what they picked up?

 

When I flew to London to Auckland, via Melbourne I got tested for explosives in Melbourne.

 

In the last days I had in England I got covered in pyro... I did not have time to clean my jacket and bags, and they were sparkling with all the MgAl and Al from spilled mixes. I had used my main bag both to transport pyro, and as a work surface to prepare it.

 

After swabbing my jacket and two bags, and swabbing nice and sparkly bits I noticed, I got a negative result and allowed on my way.

[Peret]

They're looking for one of the special detection agents that are put in plastic explosives by international treaty. There are four of them, ethylene glycol dinitrate, dimethyl-dinitrobutane (DMNB), Para-Mononitrotoluene (p-MNT) and Ortho-Mononitrotoluene (o-MNT). They're all volatile nitrated hydrocarbons, detectable at less than 1 part per billion in air. Inorganic nitrates and chlorates don't trigger the sensors.

[nater]

... You get home from a weekend shoot, blow your nose and burnt BP soot comes out. Gross, yes, but you all know what I mean.

[mikeee]

If Homeland Security is looking for (4) types of chemicals added to H.E. under treaty,

that is a sad situation.

I am sure all of the terrorists buy commercial grade explosives from the local supply house.

I would assume a terrorist organization would make there own H.E. to avoid detection.

I work for a chemical company that produces several components that can be used in solid rocket fuel

and several types of H.E.

As usual, our tax dollars wasted again.

[Potassiumchlorate]

If Homeland Security is looking for (4) types of chemicals added to H.E. under treaty,

that is a sad situation.

I am sure all of the terrorists buy commercial grade explosives from the local supply house.

I would assume a terrorist organization would make there own H.E. to avoid detection.

I work for a chemical company that produces several components that can be used in solid rocket fuel

and several types of H.E.

As usual, our tax dollars wasted again.

 

The authorities are ignorant idiots, as usual. It's no better in Europe or any other place, for that matter.

[Mumbles]

I don't know if I'd give a lot of terrorist organization the credit of being able to mass produce explosives effectively. Certainly it happens, but there are some that are at least unofficially sponsored by the state. In that case, it's not even a question on what they do. I know some certainly will have the capability to manufacture, but I doubt they are of the type that will be trying to blow up airplanes.

 

I've heard rumors a few years back that they were developing scanners to test for peroxides as well. It's probably easier said than done to pick out the nasty variety, and leave toothpaste and platinum blondes alone.

[Peret]

If Homeland Security is looking for (4) types of chemicals added to H.E. under treaty, that is a sad situation.

This goes back well before DHS existed, back to the 1970s when Czech-made commercial Semtex was the HE popular with political radicals, and it's an international treaty, not a US idea. Military plastic is not so tagged, but I believe it has other identifiers in it that make it traceable back to the manufacturer and original purchaser.