You know you're a Pyro when...

[dan999ification]

its a benzomatic.

 

Dan.

[pyroshell]

When the you get a call from the FBI asking what was that last comp for that rocket engine.(because they want to use it)

 

when someone finds a bomb in city hall and the bomb squad calls you to defuse it.

 

When you are flying on a plane and you can't sleep because you know if someone had a bomb that you would be the only one on the plane capable of defusing it.

 

when your chemistry teacher is terrified of you and what you can do in class when he is not looking.

 

when you are at you son's first tee-ball game and can't stop thinking of how good of a 3" former the baseball would make.

 

when you buy flower but don't bake.

 

When you go to a fireworks stand and think how can they have so many violations of Federal law and still have shitty cakes.

[mikeee]

When you make an impulse buy of a Grizzly Lathe so you can start making your own rocket tooling.

[taiwanluthiers]

.. when the term "Black body radiation" isn't a racial slur.

 

.. your iphone exploding makes you happy.

 

.. you see plastic toy ball halves (the one with the toy mouse inside so the ball rolls around by itself from the mouse running) and think to yourself "That would make a good 6" shell hemi".

 

.. you pick up wooden pallets to use as firewood (for making charcoal)

[asdercks]

HI guys I am new to this forum but i have been working with fireworks for two years now and I think that You know when you're a pyro when you get your girlfriend and her sister to work on your fireworks...i called them my Mexican Chinese workers

[dagabu]

When you make an impulse buy of a Grizzly Lathe so you can start making your own rocket tooling.

 

When you DO buy a lathe to make your own rocket tooling!

[TritonPyro]

Make up religious holidays just to fire canister shells.

[DasSchaben]

I'll bite.

 

When you are interrogated re: display fireworks, and you consequently give up display fireworks even though you're licensed. Then you return to APC two years later.

 

This ethical, responsible hobby never really dies.

 

When you manage to convert your skeptical best friend into a supporter of your hobby.

 

When you still have your hydraulic press three years later, and you need to trade it in for something smaller and more portable.

 

When you sign up for online advanced university chemistry tutorials, but you aren't studying chemistry.

 

When you have a long-term career plan in mind, but you still take a lot of time to consider switching majors to inorganic chemistry.

 

When, three years later, you still feel like an idiot for that one mindless message you posted on APC ages ago, even though you're matured since then.

 

When your previously skeptical friend starts contacting you and referencing you every single time they hear or see fireworks.

[AzoMittle]

You know you're a pyro when you hear a prepubescent boy yell out "Awwwweeeesooome!" from somewhere behind you.

[TranslucentDragon]

...when you go into a fireworks store and correct the seller on the compostion of the fireworks.

[AirCowPeacock]

Did you have success?

[Anarchy08]

...when you get your mate to help you get the 8'' HDPE pipe of the side of the road into the wagon at 10 at night

..when that mate isn't really surprised by requests like that and just agrees to help

...your expected to bring fireworks to social gatherings

..your shunned because you didn't bring anything to said social gatherings

...you get texts from your neighbors telling you 'encore'

..your will reads; 'after death to be cremated and turned into a 10'' shell'

...when you cant decide what effect that shell will be

..when you now depend on 'pyro fixes' to keep you going in between shows

...when you light something, the crowd stays 10 metres behind you

..you know what a coal miner feels like after knock off

..you have killed jet lighters with visco soot

 

and finally.. you know your a pyro when... You build a shed just to have a dedicated space for pyro

[AirCowPeacock]

and finally.. you know your a pyro when... You build a shed just to have a dedicated space for pyro

 

I'll be building a shed for my magazine, which I'll be fixing up to regulation this week.

[AirCowPeacock]

...you insist on screening and diapering together dry ingredients when baking.

...paperwork means cutting out Kraft paper.

[leedrill]

when you order more tubes you dont even have tooling for cause the misses said shes thinking of leaving you for someone with a 6lb stick rocket and you can only pull out a 3lb

 

when you get disappointed by your biggest salute of the evening to the point of thinking you did something wrong and you turn around and everyones faces are like holy crap {whilst listening to the thunder bouncing of the mountain range}

[taiwanluthiers]

During every ATF inspection, the agent says "I am with the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms ...", and you say "I guess this is not about the alcohol or the tobacco...."

[leedrill]

when the misses talks bout a wedding budget and you say WHAT!!!!!! how will i afford supplies for said wedding {and the date is gone by the time you need to build }

[Tuppnus]

 

When you spend all your money on KCLo4, KNO3, Al, Mg, MGAL, shells, fuse, tubes and food.

 

...and that is your order of priorities

[shouldnoteatindat]

-when you put your bed in your closet so you have more space in your room for pyro.

[shouldnoteatindat]

-when you live in the north but keep a fair stock of cockroach poison in your house

[pyroman2498]

you know your a pyro when , your on Piers Morgan and he arguing to you that there should be " Explosive control " and than throws in gun control into the mix ( You will only get the joke if you have seen piers morgan LIVE on CNN )

[hindsight]

--When your doctor tells you your BP is too high, so you tell him you'll lower the price for him.

 

--When your workout buddy tells you they press 280 pounds and you tell them you press up to 8000.

 

--When your wife takes you to the beach to collect shells and you're disappointed that they're mollusks.

 

--When the sergeant tells you you're on KP and you carefully extinguish your cigarette.

 

--When you steal from the cat's litter box.

 

--When you find a woman with black thumbs attractive.

 

--When you'd give a friend a gold or silver mine, and promise them the stars.

 

--When you spend a fortune for something that goes up in smoke.

[BrainDamage]

so many are true and that makes them funny

[Wolverine]

....when you spend 20min debating whether it's best to pick or blow your nose, for fear of friction/impact sensitivity.
....when the local display operators are terrified you'll show up and spend another 4 hours talking and asking questions.
....when you have a dog with 3 legs because he mistook a malfunctioning shell for his favorite ball.
....when your greatest fear is your cat getting into the work area wanting to be petted when the humidity is low.
....when you play live action minesweeper, mowing the lawn.
....when playing fetch with the dog is a chance to test your latest batch of BP (probably the cause of joke #3)

I went for more exaggerated humor, but what do you expect from a guy who's avatar is a Muppet?

[hindsight]

Wolverine--

 

Enjoyed your theatre of the absurd.

 

Next time, 1) use a wet handkerchief to blow your nose, 2) mist your cat with your sprayer (sans dextrin) before petting, 3) muzzle your dog around fireworks, 4) use a disguise each time you approach a display operator, and 5) use a flamethrower to manage your lawn.

 

-hindsight